Improving your sex life

A few broad suggestions about sex can be made that likely apply to all of us:

  • Be aware of and take pride in your sexuality; it is one of the most powerful and constructive forces in your life.
  • Be genuine and spontaneous in giving it expression. Know what turns you on and don’t be afraid to share it with your partner. Want to know what turns your partner on and when you can, offer it.
  • Don’t be afraid to ask for sex, and don’t let rejection destroy you. When you are asked and you don’t feel like it, for whatever reason, don’t make it a rejection but rather a provisional postponement, with a considerate and honest explanation.
  • Encourage your partner to reach out for or ask for sex whenever he or she is in the mood.
  • Never use sex as a bargaining tool
  • Make it your business to find out what actually turns your partner on. Don’t make any assumptions in this area.
  • Show appreciation for your mate as a person before and after, as well as during, sex. And during sex engage your partner’s mind and feelings as well as his or her body.
  • Become familiar with and enjoy your partner’s entire body.
  • Become aware of the real pleasures of foreplay and afterplay, and “go” with them, without undue focus on performance, athleticism, or orgasm.
  • In the appropriate manner and timing, tell your partner what your turn-ons are, and what you need to be sexually aroused and satisfied. Make it clear that you’re hoping for the same honesty from your partner.
  • Sex is not necessarily a serious or romantic matter. Be as relaxed and childish and playful as you wish.


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